Should We Do a First Look?
Ahhh, the iconic first look. This moment of the day is much debated with couples, as it has become somewhat of a standard in today’s wedding scene. Couples, of course, have the option of sharing an intimate moment together before their ceremony, or opting for the more traditional route of seeing each other at the altar.
Let us preface this article with this: there is no right or wrong choice. Before we go into why couples choose each option, we want to remind you that this is your day. Whatever you decide to incorporate into or leave out of your timeline is ultimately your decision. Please don’t let anyone: friends, family, culture, etc. influence it. Weigh the options for yourselves and come to a decision point together. We promise that will lead to the best choice for you.
Another disclaimer: we believe that these kinds of decisions should be made with this philosophy: no part of your wedding day is about the photos. Yes, photos are important, that’s why we’re in this business, but please don’t make the decision to do something or not because it “looks good in pictures.” Someday down the line, you will look at photos from your day and not care as much about the images themselves, but you will care about how those images will jog your memory of how it felt to be in that moment. Trust your photographers to capture your moments beautifully, and guard your hearts enough to make the day really about you enjoying it together.
Now here are a few reasons why couples choose each option!
Sharing a First Look
We will cut to the chase here: your wedding day, no matter how well you plan it, will go by in a blur. You will not get a ton of time together just the two of you. This might be something that is hard to swallow for some, so we like to suggest taking of advantage of as many moments as you can have alone! A great moment is a first look. You can set aside virtually as much time as you’d like for this moment to exchange gifts, personal vows, pray, or simply soak in the fact that you’re about to get married! We like to use our longest lenses to ensure we give you the space you need to make this moment intimate.
On wedding days, nerves run high. There is so much raw emotion you will experience, and by the time you reach your venue all dressed up, you could feel things you’ve never felt before, or never expected to feel. Having a first look is a great way to calm your own and each other’s nerves. We’ve noticed this moment helps to center our couples and remind them of exactly why they are in this moment! Creating space to talk, hug it out, or pray totally combats this!
Having a first look also creates the potential to have a more fluid timeline! Family and bridal party portraits are typically done after the ceremony during cocktail hour. Some of our couples find it really important to be present at cocktail hour, having the ability to mingle with their guests who have travelled far and wide to witness their union! Sharing a first look allows you to move the family & bridal party portrait part of the day to before your ceremony, so all you have to worry about after you exchange vows is eating, drinking, and being merry!
As photographers, we feel like we have to add this point. First look photos are always so unique and SWEET!! We love these intimate, often emotional moments of the day when no one else is bothering you, and all you have to think about is each other! But, like we said before, your day is not at all about the photos, it’s about the moments you share!
Having your First Look at the Altar
We said it once and we’ll say it again, first looks are the trend at the moment, but please do not feel obligated to be trendy on your wedding day. We are all for the traditional first look at the altar! Plot twist: the photos are still just as sweet (but again, that is not what this is about AT ALL), AND everyone you love gets to witness this absolutely beautiful moment. Your love for each other is absolutely reflected in the way you look at each other, what a special way to be able to allow everyone to witness a tangible example of the depth of your love for one another!
Even if you don’t see each other before you’re walking down the aisle, there are still so many options for sharing an intimate moment to chat, pray, hold hands, and calm each other’s nerves without being in one another’s line of vision. You can exchange gifts or letters while each other is getting ready, or in the presence of one another. Your photographer will absolutely be there to capture the sweet innocence of the two of you holding hands around the corner, praying, or hyping each other up for the day. These moments are incredibly special and are often even more emotional than a traditional first look!
photos by Stefanie Elizabeth Photography
Why We Chose to Have a First Look
We feel that including our personal experience often helps our couples decide whether or not to do a first look! Here is why we are grateful we chose to share one!
First and foremost, we were a covid couple who chose to go through with wedding plans even with a reduced guest list. The fact that we have people in our lives who love us enough to travel to California in the middle of a pandemic (some from states away!!) made it that much more important to us that we do our best to enjoy all the time we could have with all of our people. It was pretty much imperative that we organized our timeline to offer that time: moving our bridal party & family photos to before the ceremony so that we could mingle with our guests, and enjoy the absolutely delicious appetizers we chose for cocktail hour (give us alllllll the food)!!!
By the time we got to our first look, we both realized we missed each other A TON that morning (exactly what we mean by you will experience all kinds of random emotions on your wedding day). We were so excited to just see and hold each other, and that first look let us have that moment an hour and a half before we would walk down the aisle.
We also have the wonderful luxury of considering each other’s friends our friends at this point, so we were excited to be able to hang out with everyone for a bit before our ceremony got started! I consider Joseph’s groomsmen some of my best friends too (and vice versa), so in a way it was comforting to both of us to have all our best friends in one place before we made our vows to each other!!!
Takeaways
So, like we said before, this is your decision, and one you should take your time with! Please don’t allow superficial factors like societal trends or having eye catching photos influence your decision! Fads are overrated and all the special, organic moments that happen naturally during a wedding day [and hiring a reputable photographer ;) ] will create so. many. opportunities for “iconic” pictures. This is your day, make it yours!!!
Happy Planning!
Hey pals! We’re Katie & Joseph, a husband & wife team, and wedding photographers in Scottsdale, Arizona.
We are big fans of documenting wedding days in an unposed, raw, genuine, and honest way that allows our couples to maximize their experience on their day while also receiving a gallery full of stunning images that communicate how it felt to be there.
Though we’re based in Phoenix, we’ll travel anywhere for a good love story (and dance party). We invite you to follow the links below to learn more about us and our services, and to get in contact with us!
